Sacrifice
by BabyBunting
Summary: spoiler warning for 8x07! what happens many months later?
1. Chapter 1

Rating: probably a K+ but putting it as a T just to be safe.

Spoilers: this fic focuses on what might (but wont) happen after 8x07, so if you don't know or don't want to know what's going to happen in 8x07, then read no further!

A/N: wow! third fic in the same number of days! - this wasn't originally going to be a chapter fic but it ended up getting a little long to have just in 1 chapter so I decided to break it down a bit for easier reading.

Disclaimer: yadda yadda yadda the usual, CSI, not mine.

**Sacrifice**

The white from Sara's knuckles slowly dissipated as she felt the plane touch down. It wasn't that Sara was afraid of flying, it was just the take-off and landing which she never looked forward to, it always hurt her ears. Sara held back as the other passengers began to disembark from the aircraft, she never understood why everyone rushed to get off first when you just got held up at baggage reclaim anyway.

After collecting her suitcase, which was of course one of the last to come off the plane, she made a quick pit-stop at the ladies and made her way to the taxi rank.

"3075 Westfall Avenue please" she stated as she got into the back seat of the first taxi she happened across.

"the Las Vegas Crime Lab?" the driver asked, seeming a little confused over her choice of destination.

Sara simply nodded.

The journey from the airport to the crime lab went swiftly and before she knew it, she was paying the driver and hauling her suitcase behind her as she entered the lab for the first time since her sudden departure just over 3 months previously.

Nothing had seemed to have changed, she noted with an inward smile.

The lab was practically deserted, which wasn't unusual for that time of night, and those who she did see were so entranced in what they were doing that they didn't even notice her presence.

She approached the reception desk. Judy was there, sorting through paperwork.

"hello how can I..." she lifted her head to greet the visitor but stopped when she realised who in fact was standing before her.

"Sara!" she exclaimed in a tone so high pitched it hurt Sara's ears.

"Judy, nice to see you again" she regarded the shorter, frizzy haired woman in front of her.

"you too Sara!"

Sara motioned for Judy to lower her voice with a gentle wave of her hand "erm... is Gil.. I mean... is Grissom in the lab?" she asked, in barely more than a whisper. Judy regarded the signing in sheet.

"Yeah he is, came in from an assignment about 20 minutes ago, he should be in the layout room if you want to go and see him?"

"Actually" Sara began "I was wondering if you could page him for me, say there's a visitor for him who will meet him in his office? don't say who it is. Tell him it's urgent?"

Judy looked confused at the request but agreed anyway.

Sara made her way into Gil's office and took a moment to reacquaint herself. She wasn't surprised to see very little had changed. He'd swopped a few of his mounted insects for ones he'd kept at home, but apart from that, it felt like she'd never gone.

in the layout room Gil's phone beeped suddenly. He let out a long angry sigh. This was a high profile case, the sheriff was breathing down his neck as it was without further interruptions.

"From: Reception

visitor in your office. it's important"

He regarded the message and wondered why Judy was being so cryptic, it really wasn't her style. He debated for a moment whether it was in fact important enough to warrant taking a break from the evidence in front of him, but he summarised that unless he actually went and found out who this mystery visitor was, he wouldn't know. He rubbed his hands over his face. _I have an awful feeling that this is going to be one of those nights which is never going to end!_

Leaving the evidence in the capable hands of Warrick, Gil excused himself and made his way to the reception.

"What the hell, Judy? you know this is a high profile case, I've got the sheriff breathing down my neck as it is..."

Judy cut him off "I know Dr Grissom, I'm sorry, but... I think this is someone you'll really want to see"

Gil huffed, and while raking his hands through his hair, he moved towards his office._Something's up_. he thought.

Sara stood towards the right side of the office, she was having a conversation with "Miss Piggy" about the weather in San Francisco compared to Vegas. It was quite a one-sided conversation, but then they usually were when it came to the irradiated foetal pig, who never really had anything to say to say about anything.

Suddenly she heard the door behind her open. She turned.

And there he stood.

Gil's breath caught in his throat when his brain registered who his visitor was. _No, it can't be, can it? Have I pulled too many doubles? Am I seeing things? _He ran his hands over his face, rubbing at his eyes, sure the image in front of him was not what he thought it was. Removing his hands, he regarded the person in front of him once again.

"Sara?" his voice finally choked out.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: see page 1!

"Gil" she sent him a small warm smile.

"_Y_ou're back" he continued, he wasn't sure whether he was asking a question or making a statement.

"Yeah"

"when... ?"

"Just now. I came straight from the airport. I knew you'd be here"

Gil found himself momentarily lost for words.

"You... erm... you look good" he said, taking a step closer, shutting the door behind him.

"Thanks, I feel good." she too took a step forwards, her conversation with Miss Piggy long forgotten. "You look good too" she lied, he looked like he hadn't slept in a week and he looked 10 years older than the last time she saw him. "How are you?"

"Surviving" he replied honestly. "So... I, ah, I take it you did what you needed to do?" another step closer.

"Yeah, yeah I did" she nodded.

"and... everything's OK?" he gently asked.

Sara let out a small chuckle. "I don't think things will ever be OK. Damaged goods will always be damaged goods even after they've been repaired" she took another step.

"You're not damaged goods, Sara"

"Gil, I'm sorry. The way I left. I just..."

"you don't need to explain Sara-"

"No, please, let me finish" she cut him off. "It was so selfish, the way I left. I could only think about me. I... I just had so much stuff going on up here- " she tapped the side of her head "- that... I couldn't see the wood for the trees anymore..."

Gil nodded and took another step closer. He remained silent, urging her to continue.

"... and then it hit me sometime last week, that while I was out there chasing the ghosts and digging up the graves of my past- the past, which I can't do anything about, no matter how much I want to, that I was actually sacrificing my future, which I _can_ do something about."

The distance between them was now a mere breath. Her deep chestnut brown eyes never leaving his searing blues.

"So that's why I came back. I realised that I want to stop living in the past, for the past, because of the past. I want to embrace my future... and my future is here-"

she reached her right hand up and stroked her long slender fingers down his cheek. Gil felt a jolt of electricity between them as skin made contact with skin. God how he had missed her touch.

"- _You're_ my future" she chocked out as tears spilled from her rich brown eyes.

She wasn't sure when exactly it happened, but she suddenly became aware that there was now no gap between them. His arms were firmly encircled around her waist, as where hers around his neck. From somewhere buried deep within her hair she heard a low muffled voice.

"Oh God, Sara, I... I missed you so much" it was so quiet, but Sara was sure she could hear tears behind the words.

"I missed you too," she let her fingers run through the curls at the back of his head "more than you could ever imagine."

They stood there for several long minutes, cherishing the moment, enjoying once again being in each others arms.

Gil was the first to pull away.

"When you left... it felt like you took a part of me away with you."

A small wry smile crept onto Sara's face. "I did." She took hold of his hands and placed them on her abdomen. Through her jacket, Gil hadn't noticed the once flat plane of her stomach was now, well, not so flat any more.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: see page 1!

His head snapped up, brown met blue "You're... ?"

"Yeah." she answered simply "and no, I didn't know before I left. It was only 4 weeks later when I realised I was late..." she chuckled to herself "I thought I was feeling ill because of the stress of it all.."

Gil looked at her. "But, I thought you were on the pill."

Sara shrugged her shoulders. "What can I tell you? I was. I guess because of the stress... I mean we knew when I started taking it that it wasn't 100 percent guaranteed protection" she took in a deep breath. "I wanted to tell you as soon as I found out, but I knew if I did – it would just make me want to come back, and I wasn't ready."

"what if... what if you..." Gil struggled with his words.

"what if I had never been ready?" she completed for him. Gil nodded. "I would have told you, Gil. I wouldn't have kept this from you. If it had gone on much longer, if the tonne of bricks hadn't hit me when they did, I was going to tell you, I wouldn't deny you."

"So... how... how far along?" his hands rubbed across her small protruding stomach. He looked at the small bump with the intensity that he did a new piece of evidence. Clearly Gil was struggling to absorb this bombshell.

"Just shy of 4 months" she smiled.

"And you've been OK?" concern was evident in his voice "I mean... no complications or anything?"

"I had a really rough week the week I found out, I couldn't keep anything down and I slept for days on end, but I think part of that was down to being stressed up to my eyeballs" she let out a small laugh "other than that I've been great."

Gil remained silent. She had been expecting this.

Sara took his hands, which seemed to have glued themselves to her stomach, and led him over to the couch where they sat facing each other.

"Is this OK, Gil? I mean... are we going to be OK? Because I wont force this onto you if you're not ready... but when I found out, I mean you know I couldn't have had a... a you know what... and I know you wouldn't have wanted me to get one..." she looked down at their now intertwined fingers. She smiled when she saw he still wore his wedding band. After the way she left, she wouldn't have blamed him if he had launched it into the desert, never to be seen again.

His head snapped up " Oh God, Sara, no. No of course I wouldn't have wanted you to have got a... a you know what" one hand reached up and cupped her cheek. He drew in a breath and let it out again very slowly "- it's just a lot to take in. I'm sure we will be OK, but I just need time.."

"I understand, Gil, I do. This... erm... kinda came as a bit of a shock to me too."

Gil nodded and then reached into his pocket for his phone.

"What are you doing?" she enquired.

"I'm sending Catherine a message" she watched as he typed

"To: CWillows

From: GGrissom

Sara's home. Going to take some time off. Hold the fort, I'll call later"

Sara smiled at his use of the word 'home'. It wasn't 'Sara's back' or 'Sara's returned'. No, 'home' was definitely the right word. He pressed the send button and looked up into her brown depths and smiled. Only seconds later his phone vibrated, indicating a new message, "God that woman's quick" he chuckled as he flipped it open and read.

"To: GGrissom

From: CWillows

Wonderful! Take all the time you need, you probably have about 3 years worth of holiday days saved up anyway! We'll be fine. Give Sara our love"

They both smiled as he flipped the phone shut once again.

"But aren't you on a case?"

"Screw the case" he rose to his feet and offered his hand to Sara "I've got far more important things to be concerned about right now"

"You've changed" she laughed "not that I'm complaining!"

_That laugh, that laugh! oh how have I missed that laugh!_ He brought her close into his arms.

"Well, a wise woman once told me about stopping living for the past and start living for the future" he dropped a tender kiss onto her lips before grabbing her suitcase with his other hand "lets go and start living our future"

THE END

A/N: OK, OK, yes she ended up pregnant... but I have been kinda sad that it doesn't look like we'll ever get a geekbaby, especially after watching season 1 re-runs where Grissom got so excited about Lindsey's birthday... he was such a free spirit and we got to see some of his inner child... he would have made a great dad... so I needed to get this out of my system.

Did you like it? if so, spare a few seconds and tell me through the review button, I really do get a kick out of reviews (see my profile as to why it means so much to me)  



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